phpto: tricia krefetz

In every phenomenon the beginning remains always the most notable moment.
-- Thomas Carlyle

So if I only had fifteen minutes with a parent or "pre-parent," what would I tell them?

First I'd want to give them the big picture about what we're seeking to do when we parent for peace: much of this is about what parents can do to foster their child's robustly healthy brain, particularly the structure and function of the intricate network of the social brain. When children wire up with circuitry for such

andrea smith of andrea renee photography

What do babies need from you most? You know it—your love. That part’s easy; you’re besotted. And you’re sleep-deprived. So, what’s next? Babies, as Anne Lamott famously lamented, do not come with operating instructions.

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photo: andrea smith of andrea renee photography

There is no “perfect” mother. At least not in the traditional, societal (non)sense. As a mother, you are, however, a perfect interpretation of the unique gifts of your soul.

No two mothers are alike, and that is a beautiful thing! When we look toward others for the model of perfection, we are not honoring our authentic selves. We are living outside our selves. We are succumbing to the myth. Could we improve on how we react to our child’s meltdowns? Sure. Could we all work on being more present with our children and families? Of course. Should we compare ourselves to the moms who seem to have a handle on the mothering thing so perfectly that we feel crawling under the nearest dank rock to sulk because we can’t even come close to accomplishing what other moms can? Absolutely not! Oftentimes, as mothers, we are thrust into insecurity due to others’ accomplishments or judgments. And that’s not where we want to be.

photo: denise herrick borchertMayim Bialik is truly a woman of many hats. Not only is she starring in “The Big Bang Theory” - one of the hottest shows in television right now, but she also holds a Ph.D. in Neuroscience from UCLA, is a Lactation Education Consultant, has earned the title of “Spokesmama” for the Holistic Moms Network, and is the loving mother of two young sons. With all of that going on in her life, it’s a wonder that Mayim has found the time to write a book on parenting. But that’s just what she did! Mayim’s newest project, Beyond The Sling: A Real-Life Guide to Raising Confident, Loving Children the Attachment Parenting Way, is currently a best-selling book all about the benefits of Attachment Parenting (AP) and how the practice has worked in her own family. 

Mayim does a wonderful job of weaving together the main principles of AP with scientific facts from her academic background, as well as personal anecdotes that help show exactly how this parenting philosophy works. I recently had the chance to talk with Mayim about her book and was able to get a better idea of how this busy mama is able to make it all work. 

My kids love their naughty chair. It was a big score at a garage sale some years ago when I was desperate to find a tool that would work miracles – much like it does with that oh-so-together (read: childless) British nanny on television. 

As a mom to a toddler in the throes of the terrible twos and a newborn, I was willing to do whatever it took to turn that less-than-desirable behavior into something more manageable. Something more survivable.  Something that didn’t leave me feeling like I was completely incapable of taking care of more than one child at a time. Because, let’s face it, it was kind of too late to return either one.

So I found the perfect naughty chair. It’s a peppy lime green. I figured the peeling paint (so long as it wasn’t lead-based) added a touch of charm to something that would ultimately be used for some quite un-charming moments. 

How lucky could a mom get? 

Well, it turns out incredibly lucky because in the next year I was able to take in a number of parenting talks by faculty at Cedar Valley Waldorf School in Squamish, BC where my children now attend preschool and kindergarten, and by Dr. Gordon Neufeld, an internationally renowned developmental psychologist and author (Hold On To Your Kids, with Gabor Mate) whose book has been translated into eight languages. It was then that I learnt exactly why it was this amazingly awesome naughty chair was falling short. 

We wait for it all year.

That’s not quite true. In July, after 2 straight months of eating asparagus every way I can imagine, I want nothing to do with it. The gaudy months of summer blare out the quieter months of spring. Bright, bedazzling, sun-drenched — the fruits of July and August are far more memorable than spring’s first real green. By the time the cooler months have arrived, we cannot wait for the first glimpse of the muted oranges and sepia tones of autumn squashes. The first month or so of winter, I even look forward to parsnips and celery root.

 photo: andrea smith of andrea renee photography

“The dream shows the inner truth and reality of the patient as it really is: not as I conjecture it to be, and not as he would like it to be, but as it is.“ 

-- Carl Jung

Dreams. We all have them. And by “dreams,” I don't mean our hopes and aspirations. I am referring to those strange stories that we experience during the night when we sleep. Some of us may rarely remember our dreams. Some of us may remember them, but then have no idea about what to do with them. We might say: “I had the strangest dream last night,” but then carry on with our day without giving it another thought. I have learned from my many years of working with my dreams and the dreams of others that these strange, nightly occurrences are really worth paying attention to. They are, indeed, precious gifts that can profoundly impact our lives, if only we take the time to learn how to unwrap their significances.

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Photos by Tamara Muth King

Feng Shui is the 4,000 year old Chinese practice of making positive changes in your home to create positives changes in your life. At the heart of Feng Shui is the idea that our homes and surroundings influence all aspects of our well being---physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Therefore if you wish to improve your life, you can do so by changing your home. One of the most effective ways to positively enhance your home and life is to clear your clutter. Feng Shui believes that as you let go of the clutter in your home and release the old, you simultaneously make space for something new in your life.  In other words, as you clean house, you clean self.